A Social Experiment
by Port in the Storm
Summary: Everyone assumed that the Yondaime was dead when they found his empty clothes and a baby wrapped in a blanket. But appearances are deceiving, and not everything is as it seems. There is a reason why his body was never found. A challenge by EDelta88.
1. Chapter 1

A Social Experiment

Chapter 1- A Fear of the Unknown

Warnings: AU, Mild Violence, Possible Swearing

Disclaimer: Naruto © Kishimoto

A Challenge by EDelta88.

--o0oOOOo0o—

Death, death and destruction.

It rained down on Konoha during that week.

On October sixth, the Kyuubi was spotted at the Fire temple. One message was all that escaped.

The rest had been hidden in the devastation the biju had caused.

On October seventh, it came within sight of the Hokage temple, tearing through the grand forests that surrounded Konoha.

It approached, closer and closer, until on the ninth, it had breached Konoha's walls.

The Yondaime had been seen, tired, drawn, and weary, frantically scribbling out seal designs with his brush.

Some ridiculed him, but others could not help but wonder if the Yondaime would be the savior of them all.

Then dawned October tenth, where shinobi fought for their lives, their families, and their very homeland.

If the Kyuubi managed to get past…there would not be a Konoha to go back to, whether they survived or not.

They fought for the hope the Yondaime offered, the possibility living to survive the nightmare.

He capitalized on the time they gave him.

And the Kyuubi shivered, vanishing into the Shinigami's grasp. No one knew what happened; and no one knew the truth.

The only thing that Sarutobi found was a small, quiet boy.

He gently traced the black spiral seal on the baby's stomach, marveling at the seeming simplicity of the seal.

It was Minato's last wish. He would protect this boy, Minato's son.

This boy, this child, with blonde hair, and blue eyes.

--o0oOOOo0o—

Uzumaki Naruto was far more than what he seemed to be.

Namikaze Minato had been more intelligent than most gave credit to.

He would not wish the fate of a jinchuriki on anyone.

But if anyone would have this fate, it would be no one but him.

Namikaze Minato, now named, Uzumaki Naruto.

There were no newborn children that day; if there were any, they were dead. The Konoha General Hospital had been worst struck on the west wing, where the Obstetrics ward was.

Minato could only assume the worst of his unborn child and pregnant wife.

So he did the only thing he could, modifying an impossible seal to do something even more absurd.

Turn him into a child, and use him for the sealing instead.

And beyond all chances, it worked.

The younger form of Minato Namikaze was being mistaken for Naruto Uzumaki, what his son would have been named.

Minato hadn't told anyone, yet.

Questions had once flitted angrily through his head; would Konoha honor his dying words? Would her people look past the taint of a demon? Would they, at least, treat the jinchuriki with respect? If not for the jinchuriki himself, then for Minato.

It seemed not.

Civilians scorned him; calling him what he was not. Shinobi feared him; but they, at least, treated him with decency.

Well, at least the jounin and the ANBU did; they were far too loyal to the Hokage to do anything else. He couldn't speak for the chunin that tried their hand a killing a child.

And it continued in this vein for ten years.

--o0oOOOo0o—

Minato woke at five-thirty, his internal clock never letting him sleep any later than that.

He frowned.

Just once, he would like to sleep in, like when he was a child, but….

Ninja instincts stayed with you forever.

The rare times he did sleep in, he was one- heavily injured, or two- recovering from poison or wounds.

He rose from the small futon, carefully rolling it up and placing it within the small closet. It was filled with blue, black, or orange clothing.

Minato ignored the clothing for now, instead focusing on the small pack deposited on the floor of the small storage area. He opened it, and inspected the folder within, making sure that the homework inside was correctly done, with some carefully orchestrated mistakes. Despite the fact that he was the Kyuubi jinchuriki, in this day and age, he refused to act entirely dumb for the villager's sake of mind. It wasn't Minato's problem; if they worried about the Kyuubi jinchuriki attacking them, they should have treated him better.

If they did attack, he would fight back. And he would drag their asses to the Sandaime, where they would be quietly executed as per the law.

But, Minato frowned; he hadn't wanted Danzou recruiting him with all the 'living weapon' shit the man pulled. He refused to ever, ever work under the ROOT commander's orders. So, he acted like a somewhat average, dense ten-year old academy student. While he did pass under the man's radar, it was difficult. And too often, he let things slip.

When the Sandaime watched him act out, it was with a mischievous twinkle in the old man's eyes. Minato was sure the Professor knew far more than he let on, at least, about the second persona that he showed to everyone else.

It became confirmed when Sarutobi handed him a jutsu scroll and a book on fuinjutsu.

Luckily, his acting had improved since then, and Minato pranked poor Iruka-sensei and acted out because, as he explained to the Sandaime, he was bored.

And Sarutobi covered for him, knowing that 'Naruto' was actually a prodigy, and a powerful asset to Konoha.

He allowed 'Naruto' to live on his own (because Minato had once asked to; the orphanage people were only getting more and more frightened by his growing proficiency in taijutsu); he gave 'Naruto' scrolls and books to learn from behind the council's back, and treated 'Naruto' like a grandson.

Minato was grateful for that.

There were others, too. The heart of Konoha had not vanished entirely. Iruka, the Academy teacher, bought him ramen, despite his initial dislike of the Kyuubi jinchuriki. 'Wolf' (and Minato laughed so hard when he first spotted the ANBU dropping by-it was _Kakashi_, after all; who would have thought?) brought vegetables and knocked at the door to give them to him. Minato had not been so amused when he spotted the ANBU breaking up a civilian riot, full of people ready to kill a child, for the demon inside. Kakashi mostly watched the apartment, never talking, but instead being a silent presence.

There was also Ayame, and Teuchi; the ramen stand owners, and Minato often had to hide a smile when Ayame chased out customers with an iron pan for calling 'Naruto' a demon.

But even if there were so few that knew 'Naruto' for what he truly was; a simple, lonely boy, they were worth protecting Konoha for. And that was all Minato needed.

Minato sighed and pulled on a blue turtleneck sweater with an orange spiral on the back (his homage to Kushina), preparing for the absolutely brain-meltingly boring day up ahead.

--o0oOOOo0o—

Hm..

Minato smirked, standing in front of his classroom at the Ninja Academy. It was nine-thirty, which meant he had arrived at the Academy exactly an hour late.

Perfect. He'd always wanted to see how Obito felt, being so tardy to team meetings and practically any other appointment they had.

Oddly enough, all Minato felt was an strange anticipation of Iruka's and the students' reactions, despite the fact he'd pulled this trick many, many times before.

He shrugged. Oh well. If he got some enjoyment out of this, even if it was slightly sadistic, it would be interesting. Maybe next time he'd try three hours late. But…nah. He did have some sense of pride, after all.

Minato casually strolled into the room like nothing was wrong. "Hey, Iruka-sensei!" He waved a hand lazily at the fuming teacher, whose full name was Umino Iruka.

"NA-RU-TO…!" Minato stood back and observed the effects. A bit angrier than usual, maybe…nothing special. The man's brown hair, pulled back into a spiked ponytail, shook angrily as he leaned over the desk to glare furiously at Minato, who stared at the teacher, wondering vaguely how painful the scar across the man's nose had been. He scanned the other students' faces. Oh, look, Kiba's jaw had hit the desk! And there was a loud cracking noise!

He hoped that the desk, and Kiba's jaw, was repairable.

"UZUMAKI NARUTO! YOU ARE ONE HOUR LATE TO THIS CLASS! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?" Er…okay. Maybe he'd pushed it a bit too far this time… Iruka's face was completely red, and the man looked like he was one step away from making sure that the Uzumaki line would end with him. Minato shuddered at the mental image.

He tipped his head up in thought. "Well, my alarm clock broke…"

"THAT'S THE SAME EXCUSE YOU USED YESTERDAY!"

"I had to help an old lady across the street?"

"For…an…entire…HOUR!?" Iruka got out through gritted teeth.

Minato shrunk back, raising his hand to scratch at the back of his head in a nervous gesture. Laughing sheepishly, he shrugged. "Yes?"

"THAT'S IT! DETENTION, AFTER CLASS, NARUTO!"

Minato winced. He hadn't been that bad had he? Well….there was that time two days ago that he painted everything in the teacher's lounge in bright orange…and when he rigged the chalkboard eraser to explode when Iruka used it for wiping the board…and then, Mizuki pissed him off with the display of stupid prejudice towards him, so Minato doused the man in itching powder with the classic bucket over a door…okay, maybe he'd been extremely irritating this week.

Understatement of the year. He'd been a right little hellion.

"Sorry?" Minato managed, in a weak voice, backing off slowly to an empty seat. He couldn't help it. He was bored!

Iruka panted furiously for a moment, about to continue his rant, before sighing and massaging his temples. It would be a waste of time, anyhow…. Naruto never listened.

Minato quickly sat, thankful that the man hadn't continued ranting. He folded his arms on the desk, and quickly fell asleep. Next to Shikamaru, the resemblance in attitudes and postures was amazing. Needless to say, Iruka didn't appreciate it.

"NARUTO!!! WAKE UP! AND YOU TOO, NARA SHIKAMARU!"

--o0oOOOo0o--

Minato and Shikamaru finally escaped the Concrete Box o' Hell (the Academy) two hours after the end of school, at five o' clock in the evening.

Their detention had been to stay back and clean the Teacher's lounge until it met with Iruka's high standards.

While Minato really didn't mind, he pretended to grouse and whine as much as the next child.

He was now secretly grateful he'd arrived an hour late, now. He'd only stayed an hour longer than the usual school time, instead of two, like Shikamaru.

He sighed, stuffing his hands deep into his pants pockets. "Hey, Shikamaru? That was-"

"Troublesome. Just troublesome." The lazy Nara finished. The boy rolled his eyes, slouching. For a minute, Minato toyed with the idea of setting the Nara's spiky ponytail on fire just to see if he would react.

On second thought….nah. Too much trouble. Oh shit. He vaguely hoped he wasn't getting too lazy.

**Author's Note:**

Kay, before I say anything else, this story is based off a challenge from EDelta88. Seriously, check out his stories and forums. Some of the ideas he has are excellent. Not to mention, he's a great author.

That said, how do you like this chapter? It's pretty short, really, but I just wanted to get a feel for how this story was going to go.

Everybody in character? Plot is relatively solid? No plot-holes? (By the way, if there are plot holes in the freakin' first chapter, I will trash this it and rewrite. Honestly….)

Please review.

Till' next time….


	2. A Little Bit Serious, or Not

A Social Experiment

Chapter 2- A Little Bit Serious, or Not.

Warnings: AU, Possible Swearing, Mild Violence

Disclaimer: Naruto © Kishimoto

A Challenge by EDelta88

--o0oOOOo0o—

When Minato got back to his apartment that night, he was greeted with the sight of ugly graffiti sprayed on his door.

It was painted an ugly, crimson red; the color of blood.

Names of the worst kind sprawled across the wood, taunting him with the life his son would have had.

Demon. Monster. And much, much worse. However, one word was cut in half as if the vandal had been interrupted midway.

Minato, not for the last time, was grateful that he was there, and not Naruto.

Those bastards were simply asking for it.

Minato didn't bother notifying the ANBU that lurked outside the building. Aside from the fact that they would have a heart attack if an Academy student could sense them, the ANBU would have already apprehended the people responsible, after seeing enough evidence. The evidence being the words on Minato's door.

Minato bit his thumb, drawing a quick fuin seal. Making sure no one but the ANBU could see him, he channeled his chakra into it. Both the words and seal evaporated into a fine reddish mist before falling to the ground, where it joined the dust and lint particles to be vacuumed in the morning by the landlady.

He frowned, noting the now-visible signs of attempted entry. A boot scuff here, a dent there. Good thing his security seals had prevented a break-in.

Minato swiped his blood on the door, infusing the small smear with chakra. The door unlocked with a click.

He pushed the door open, noting that the hinges needed to be re-oiled again as he heard the soft 'squeak' that resulted.

While probably unable to be heard by civilians, most ninja would probably hear the high-pitched sound.

Stepping into the apartment, Minato immediately stalked over to the fridge and pulled out some scavenged vegetables and cup ramen. Preparing the cup ramen, he added leafy greens to the boiling water. It was much healthier than just eating the food by itself.

Placing the cup on the nearby table, Minato opened the closet, pushing past the clothes until he reached the back of the small space. He shoved aside a thick blue coat and a pair of black pants to reveal a seemingly blank wall. Minato carefully fanned his chakra across the surface of the wall, revealing a tiny, intricate seal. He swiped his blood across it. A scroll appeared in a puff of smoke.

Grabbing it, he went back to the table, pulling the cup ramen and vegetables close, and sat. The scroll was keyed to his chakra and blood. If anyone else attempted to open it, he or she would be knocked unconscious by a mixture of poison for a maximum of twenty-four hours, and Minato would be alerted by the a seal inscribed inside the scroll itself.

The scroll contained Minato's personal notes, original jutsu, and seals that he'd been working on. It would be a disaster if anyone found out the exact contents of the scroll.

Minato pulled out a small, fine, brush, and worked on the seals late into the night.

--o0oOOOo0o—

The next day dawned, clear sunny skies taking the place of a grey, foggy mass of clouds.

Minato, as per usual, woke promptly at 5:30, dressed, washed up, and made breakfast.

Plunking a cup of coffee on the worn wooden table, he pulled out his homework from its plastic binder.

Scrutinizing the text, he narrowed his eyes as he debated the best way to make a complete mess of his homework.

The questions swam before his eyes. Calculate trajectory of kunai, blast radius of medium explosive tag and the effects on surrounding infrastructure, yadda yadda, angle at which rope should be tied so that the log falls just so…

It reminded Minato somewhat of the eviler paperwork in his Hokage days.

_Flashback: _

_ As a Hokage-in-training, Minato had come by many unusual and new things in the process of learning how to manage the internal workings of a Hidden Village. One of them was the sheer amount of nonsensical and mundane paperwork the strongest ninja in the village had to deal with on a daily basis. _

_ However, this one topped the list. _

_ "Is it really necessary, Sandaime-sama, to fill out a five page report on getting a new coffee machine in the ANBU lounge?!"_

_ As it turned out, it was. After all, the Sandaime explained, things in ANBU were highly confidential, and any items that were procured for use in the ANBU headquarters were double and triple-checked for security. _

_ And, as any Hokage knew (or eventually found out), confidential items meant lots and lots of paperwork._

_Minato was not amused. _

_Flashback end. _

But that was probably just the fact that it was work, and needed to be done, than any difficulty in the problems themselves. The questions were (for Minato) quite simple to answer. He just needed to alter the answers a little.

He grinned evilly.

--o0oOOOo0o—

"Morning, sensei!" Minato sang, prancing into the classroom at precisely one minute to 7:00 (he'd checked with his watch).

Iruka groaned and muttered something incomprehensible under his breath. He swore he was this close, _this close_ to banging his brains out on his desk and letting them dribble out his ears. Anything had to be better than dealing with Naruto for the next- he peered blearily at the calendar on his desk- two years!

The boy got decent grades, and, from what he could tell of his pranks, an excellent ability in stealth as well as incredible creativity, but Naruto was just infuriating!

He sighed. Just two more years. Just two more years. He could make it for two more years, ri-?

A poke. Someone had poked him!

"Sensei, are you alright?" Naruto's way-too-chipper voice pierced the haze.

Iruka didn't move.

Naruto poked him again, not at all gentle about it.

Iruka fancied there might be a bruise, and still didn't bother shifting from his prone position.

He did, however, when Naruto shouted full into his right ear, "IRUKA-SENSEI!!!"

He jumped, toppling a pile of homework papers delicately balanced in his 'in' tray and sending them crashing to the floor. Iruka saw red when he spotted nigh-illegible pencil scribbles all over Naruto's homework sheet.

Iruka gritted his teeth, breathing deeply even though he was sure he'd lost his hearing in his right ear. "Na-ru-to….!"

Naruto beamed at him. "I was sure sensei was asleep, so I made sure to be extra loud to wake you up! We can't start late, you know!"

That was the last straw.

"NARUTO!!!!"

--o0oOOOo0o—

Sarutobi winced at the sound that echoed from the Academy, watching a few birds take flight.

All of the jounin who heard the enraged scream swore to be extra nice to Iruka when they went to pick up their missions, lest the man 'accidentally' hand them a nice long recon mission on the border of Ame [Rain].

It was not called Rain for nothing. It rained there, constantly, and it was one the most undesirable missions there were, right next to D-ranks and catching Tora the cat.

However, there was one mission that even Iruka was not willing to hand out on a bad day. The other missions were nothing compared to this:

Catching Naruto after he'd pulled a prank.

It was most often given to ANBU recruits as punishment.

A large percentage of the rookie ANBU would laugh when they first got the assignment. An ANBU, after a mere Academy student? The veteran ANBU handing out the punishment would only smile mysteriously and chuckle to themselves.

Sooner or later, those very same rookie ANBU would find themselves either a) strung up by the backside of their ANBU uniforms in a very public place, b) having a combination of itching powder and eye irritants stuck underneath their skin-tight outfits, or c) running around the village, dyed ludicrously bright colors and doused in unmentionable substances.

Needless to say, most never disobeyed again.

The Sandaime Hokage sighed and turned to the Wolf-masked ANBU standing in a shadowed corner of the Hokage office. "What do you think?" He asked wearily.

"What do I think?" The ANBU repeated lightly. "I think we'll need to send a genin cleanup team to the Academy tomorrow."

Sarutobi groaned, already pulling out a scroll to report the estimates of the damage done and the money required for repairs.

A newly-initiated ANBU piped up from the ceiling of the office. "But Buntaichō, wouldn't it be more productive to make the boy clean up the mess himself?"

The room fell silent. A few lonely crickets chirped, made more bizarre by the fact that it was nowhere near evening and there should have been no crickets outside in the middle of the morning. Wolf made a mental note to check the guard patrol roster to find out who was making the noise.

Finally, a mouse masked ANBU standing just outside the office door took pity on the rookie. "Do you really want to chase the brat down to make him clean it up?" She asked, poking her head inside the room.

The newbie's posture stiffened, the ANBU equivalent of paling and preparing to hit one's head into a wall out of sheer embarrassment.

Wolf nodded sagely. "See? Much less trouble for all involved."

Mouse chuckled lowly, resuming her position outside the office.

Sarutobi sighed, a wry smile quirking his lips. Most ranks held the ANBU in awe, but if only they could see them now…

--o0oOOOo0o—

Minato winced, gently examining the newly-gained bump on his head with his fingers. Well, he certainly hadn't expected that much of a reaction. Though he supposed he deserved it.

Iruka was now the very model of a perfect teacher, cheerfully and patiently explaining the concepts of the lesson to his students.

Even though those students were sweating like mad and mentally promising to be on their best behavior today, lest their teacher brain them like he had done to Naruto.

Possibly the only student unconcerned about this new development was Naruto himself.

Kiba, once thought to be the most stupidly brave student in the entire class, was from this point on usurped by one Uzumaki Naruto.

Naruto, or Minato, would hold this dubious honor for years to come until a certain Sarutobi Konohamaru would rise to challenge this position.

But for now, Naruto was the undisputed king of stupid bravery.

But meanwhile, Minato, oblivious to his new promotion, idly took nigh-illegible notes on his notebook, interspersed with seals cleverly disguised as delicate, sprawling lace-like doodles.

When Iruka later checked the student's notebooks that day, he would be impressed by Naruto's latent artistic ability. But that's a story for another time.

Minato was bored. Bored of being treated like a child, bored of having to deal with all the hiding, and honestly bored of maintaining his façade.

He didn't notice Shikamaru, a seat away, sharpening his gaze on the disguised seals. Nor did he see Sasuke glaring at the back of his head, sure that Naruto was holding back.

Children, especially shinobi children, could be surprisingly perceptive if they wanted to. Being children, they often slipped under the radar of adults. And like any adult, Minato was susceptible to overlooking the small children that could see far more than their eyes betrayed.

--o0oOOOo0o—

**Author's Note:**

What's this? An update!

…Yeah.

Well, to be honest, I don't have a really good excuse besides the fact finals are coming up. And that I have to study for them.

Lame, Port, lame.

Anyways, there we have it. A bit short for my standard chapters, but it'll do. Minato's in trouble with his peers, more funnies from the ANBU and Iruka, and a dose of danger with the civilians!

This seems to be a sort of outlet for the funnies that I cannot write into my other fic (Time's Spinning Gears) because of the tone I've set for it. Every time I write this, I cannot help but revert to writing lighthearted humor. As you can see, in the beginning of the fic I tried for drama, but it failed. Miserably.

No worries, though, it will get more serious as time goes on…

-Port in the Storm


End file.
